As we step into a new year, tech will continue to shape the way our children interact with the world. With new devices and social media platforms emerging daily, and if your kids received a device for Christmas,  it is crucial  to establish guidelines that help your child develop healthy habits while ensuring their safety. Here are the top five rules that that will not only support you as a parent, but will also keep your child safe online.

In today's fast-paced digital landscape, the influence of data on our lives has never been more profound. For parents, understanding how this data shapes our children's world is essential. The online world is not just an extension of reality; it is a reality of its own—one that can significantly affect our children's beliefs, behaviors, and emotional well-being. When data reinforces these lived realities, we must pay attention.

X, per new policy guidelines, is allowing pornography. There are no parental controls on X. Because it is considered an adult app. So the only thing standing between your kid and a twitter education on porn and sexuality is a fake birthday. Read that again. We know that our youth are experiencing a mental health crisis. Teens are still forming their sense of self and developing values and beliefs. Exposure to explicit content on sites like X can lead to confusion, distorted views of sexuality, and body image issues. Pornography often portrays unrealistic and exaggerated depictions of sex and relationships. Teenagers who are exposed to this content, again, may develop unrealistic expectations about sex, intimacy, and body image, which can negatively impact their future relationships and sexual experiences.

Anyone can become an “influencer”. Social media platforms have provided a space for individuals to showcase their talents, hobbies and personal experiences. What happens is the sheer overwhelm of fly by night influencers with a few months of “expertise” and just enough charisma, relatability and aesthetically pleasing content to gain popularity inundates our screens and creates confusion. The reality is authenticity does not always translate to credibility. It is essential for consumers of social media to exercise critical thinking when evaluating information shared by influencers. One of the best things we can do as a consumer is to recognize the vast difference between influencers and experts. In other words, be damn careful of the snake oil swillers of today’s generation. They are the same as they were 100’s of years ago…just dressed in prettier clothes and they no longer have to knock on your door to get in to your home.

What I wasn’t prepared for was after 30 days off-screen, re-entry felt like a complete attack to my senses in the most rude way possible.  The time off allowed me to re-connect with what feels right and good and important in life.  As much as I lecture on this, I discovered I have slowly fallen into the screen connection trap…which led to my  feelings of imbalance and frustration. And re-entry was threatening my new sense of peace. Which begged the question, how the hell do I go back to a job that I love without immersing myself in what caused all of this crap in the first place? I gave myself May 1 as a re-entry date. The closer the date crept, I begin to feel increasingly anxious. Frustrated. Could I just….quit? Maybe I would just continue to do coaching only and wholly remove myself from social media forever. As Brene Brown has said in her recent podcast series “We are not socially, biologically, cognitively and spiritually wired for some of the shit going down right now.” I felt this statement in my bones. And my bones were afraid to get back on that wheel.

In todays world it seems like everyone knows everything about everybody.  And that just feels like a lot of…stuff…for our brains to take in.  What your neighbor had for dinner with their spouse during …#datenight.  How much your friends, friend of a friend is enjoying their vacation…#blessed. How angry the neighbor down the street is with her husband because he won’t help around the house…#whocares The first time your cousins toddler went potty on the potty….#finally. How much your favorite influencers daughter loves to dress up as Elsa and provides 50 pictures of her as proof….#letiggo

Why do we not want an algorithm feeding us only the same stuff? It provides an insanely narrow view of the world. It is restrictive, repetitive… at best monotonous…and at worst narrow-minded. We should desire diversity and new perspectives. A singular algorithmic diet limits our understanding and growth. It confines us to a small bubble that prevents us from exploring the complexities of the world. The narrow lens distorts reality, and hinders our ability to be able to embrace differences and variety. In all things.

Saturdays waking up early to a beautiful, hot, sunny day, on the boat by 8 am, returning around 8 pm tired, sunburned and ready to do it all again Sunday morning.  The smell of fish off of the pier during late summer evenings.  Watching the spiders re-weave their webs under the deck that we had destroyed during the day while swimming.  Some of my very favorite memories  that hold an incredibly  special place in my heart…skiing after my dad would get home from work.  At 5:30 I would be standing at the door with boat keys in hand.  We would take off.  This is about the time that summer starts to move into fall, and while it was still warm, all of the vacationers had left to go to other homes. I always felt so sad for them that they had to leave, while at the same time so happy that this was my home and I got to stay.   The water would be like glass.  Not a ripple or wave.  It was heaven.  I would ski until the sun went down.  Just me, the water, and sunsets.  I will never forget those days. 

Are we addicted to social media…or are we bingeing? Or….is it both? The research is limited at best in this area. It is incredibly important that we take a look at these behaviors as the point to future complications when it comes to protecting our kids in the online space.